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When Pride Still Mattered

Spotlights making his large shadow larger, “Lombardi” emerged from the darkness, slowly striding to centre stage.

My ticket told me that I was sitting in The Circle in the Square Theatre. The calendar told me it was December 29, 2010. My body told me I was 45 years old.

But as I saw the “Lombardi” character emerge onstage to open the play bearing his name, I was emotionally transported.

Not just back to a time when Vince Lombardi patrolled the sidelines in Green Bay. But to a time when I was forming my passion for the greatest sport in the world. Lombardi was dead at this point, but I worshiped what he had done. Even though my favourite NFL team was (and is) the Steelers; even though my favourite player was (and still is) Gale Sayers – I loved what Lombardi stood for and what he achieved.

Paul Brown went to 10 straight championship games (four in the old AAFC and six in the NFL), coaching the team he owned and christened. He did it with innovation and tactics. Chuck Knoll has won more Super Bowls than any other coach. He did it by massaging fragile psyches, balancing egos and embracing odd personalities. In different generations, George Halas and Don Shula are the only coaches to notch 300 victories.

But only Lombardi has won five NFL championships (I think, correct me if I am wrong) and he did it in just nine seasons with the Packers. He did it by taking the worst team in football in 1959 and, with the same core players, had them in the finals in two seasons and atop the podium in three. For me, it has always been about how he did it as much as what he did. There is a reason the Super Bowl trophy my Steelers are going to win (yet again) this year is named after him.

Lombardi understood people more than any coach who ever coached the game. He motivated them by making the “relentless pursuit of perfection” their goal. He fortified them by having them train harder than any pro coach would ever suggest. He convinced them by developing a single, powerful identity clothed in one offensive play – the PACKER SWEEP – that nobody could stop.

These three principles: never-ending pursuit of a goal, outworking others and creating overwhelming confidence – can work in any walk of life. Relationships. Friendships. Sports. Business.

For that, we owe Lombardi.

But as a youngster reading about Lombardi, I am doubtful (and hopeful) my reflections weren’t that deep. But, in some ways, they were. When I read Run to Daylight, I came to the realization that if I wanted something, all I had to do was work for it. I was incredibly insecure as a kid. This book gave me hope. It actually made me feel that it wasn’t about what you were born with. As an adult, I read When Pride Still Mattered by Pulitzer Prize winner David Maraniss. This isn’t a football book. It’s a book about what drives greatness in a reader.

If you want to understand yourself better, if you want to understand how to overcome your own demons… read it. If you want to understand why every family in the world is a mess… read it.

The current Lombardi play on Broadway is based on this book. My wife was generous enough to sit through it with me. For her, it was Broadway – great acting by the Marie Lombardi character… and, I suspect, perhaps a curiosity to understand me better.

For me, it was time travel. Seeing that play took me from my present day love of the game back to

the years when I would watch Condredge Holloway, Tommy Clements and later J.C. Watts guide my beloved (Ottawa) Rough Riders to Grey Cup titles and injustice (see offensive pass interference penalty on Tony Gabriel, circa 1981, I believe). It took me back to Franco Harris and Rocky Bleier. It took me back to Herschel (which is my nickname) Walker at Georgia and to the (almost) Toronto Northmen of the WFL. It took me to Johnnie Walton and the Boston Breakers of the USFL.

It took me back to being four-foot-nothing in grade nine. Struggling with being short. Struggling with not being a great football player, wrestler, or clarinet player. It took me back to wearing velour and living in the shadow of my dad – the hero teacher at my school – and older sister who I thought was perfect… as did the rest of my freaking hometown!

Football and my heroes like Lombardi let a little boy escape. It gave me confidence. It gave me pride.

That’s why I coach. Because of what the game can do to help little men become young men.

That’s why I melted when Dan Lauria as Lombardi strolled across the stage and the rest of the crowd applauded. My throat closed, my eyes followed. The tears came flowing out at an embarrassing pace. I wanted to go up onstage and hug him. This ghost. This myth. This guardian angle. This hero. My secret friend. My made-up pal.

Lombardi. He is football.

I have a poster that adorns my office wall with a portrait of Lombardi in his stoic pose. Half-smile, half-grimace on his face. Neat black suit, hands folded gently behind his back. The text of the poster is Lombardi’s famous speech – What It Takes to Be Number One. The poster stands next to my door and I am sure that many an intern has wondered what I am staring at. My eyes lost in Lombardi’s. My lips mouthing every word. My right hand clenched in the tense fist I make when I’m absorbed by something.

This speech is an invincible spirit raiser for any occasion. I have copied it here for you. Read it. Keep it. Read it again in a week. And the week after, and…

What It Takes to Be Number One

 

Vince Lombardi
Vince Lombardi

Winning is not a sometimes thing; it’s an all the time thing. You don’t win once in a while; you don’t do things right once in a while; you do them right all the time. Winning is a habit. Unfortunately, so is losing.

There is no room for second place. There is only one place in my game, and that’s first place. I have finished second twice in my time at Green Bay, and I don’t ever want to finish second again. There is a second place bowl game, but it is a game for losers played by losers. It is and always has been an American zeal to be first in anything we do, and to win, and to win, and to win.

Every time a football player goes to ply his trade he’s got to play from the ground up – from the soles of his feet right up to his head. Every inch of him has to play. Some guys play with their heads. That’s O.K. you’ve got to be smart to be number one in any business. But more importantly, you’ve got to play with your heart, with every fiber of your body. If you’re lucky enough to find a guy with a lot of head and a lot of heart, he’s never going to come off the field second.

Running a football team is no different than running any other kind of organization – an army, a political party or a business. The principles are the same. The object is to win – to beat the other guy. Maybe that sounds hard or cruel. I don’t think it is.

It is a reality of life that men are competitive and the most competitive games draw the most competitive men. That’s why they are there – to compete. To know the rules and objectives when they get in the game. The object is to win fairly, squarely, by the rules – but to win.
And in truth, I’ve never known a man worth his salt who in the long run, deep down in his heart didn’t appreciate the grind, the discipline. There is something in good men that really yearns for discipline and the harsh reality of head to head combat.

I don’t say these things because I believe in the “brute” nature of man or that men must be brutalized to be combative. I believe in God, and I believe in human decency. But I firmly believe that any man’s finest hour – his greatest fulfillment to all he holds dear – is that moment when he has to work his heart out in a good cause and he’s exhausted on the field of battle – victorious.

– Vince Lombardi

Lucas’ Story

One of our colleagues needs your help.

Lucas Spata, just 35 years old, of the Vancouver Canucks marketing team is losing his three-year battle with micro cell cancer. He is presently in a hospice in Vancouver and soon he will leave behind a young widow and a three-year-old son.

His family faces an emotional battle and a financial one. But many people have stepped forward, including the Canucks organization, to help.

Lucas is a good friend of a good friend of mine, which is why I decided to help spread the appeal for more help. He is a valuable contributor to our industry. Most of you don’t know him. Personally, I’ve only met him once, but his story is a tragic reminder of how fortunate many of us are.

Take a moment to read his story and send some support. It doesn’t have to be money. While donations are needed, so is support, including just telling others and sharing his story.

Read on about Lucas — I’m sure you will touched by his unbelievable concern for others, despite knowing his own fate is sealed.

www.spatafamily.com

Mo’mentum

The Mo’ is flowing at MojanOne!

This week I personally passed the Mollenium mark in fundraising, scoring $1236.00 to date in support of Prostate Cancer research. Thanks to all of my Mo’ Bros and Mo’ Sistas who have supported me. And if you haven’t…. Well,  click here and show me the Mo’ney!!!

Apparently, cracking the big M has me in something called the “Platinum Club”. That’s the trackable part of this fundraiser. But what isn’t tracked is the really important stuff. The jokes. The jabs. The conversations. The raising awareness. The office camaraderie. The teasing. The styling. The education.

In short, the Word-of-Mo’uth. Literally.

Dad and the boys
Dad and the boys

That’s the most amazing part of this fundraiser. Everywhere I go with th is silly stache, I am instantly turned into an advocate for Prostate Cancer awareness. For an entire month. Unreal!

I’m a bandwagon jumper. So a month is a long time for me. The longer it goes, the more I’m into it.

Yes, there is the personal connection as it relates to my Pops. He and my Mom were in town this week and they went to see my oldest son play hockey. For three days, that was all he could talk about. At 10, playing in front of your grandparents is like playing on Hockey Night in Canada!

Beyond that, I think it’s the first time since a disaster-like fundraiser, that I have seen so many people get jazzed by doing something so good.

My staff are all over it.

There is Lindsay, the Calgary-based intern, constantly near the top of the fundraiser leader board.

There is Pierre, in Toronto, who finally looks French.

There is Norm, in Lindsay (Ontario), who definitely looks like he is from Lindsay, Ontario.

There is Brian, who might as well give up.

There is Jody, who is “virtually unstoppable.”

Lindsay
Lindsay

Pierre
Pierre

Norm
Norm

Brian
Brian

Jody
Jody

The team is having a bake sale on Friday to raise money. I just donated four MLS Cup tickets for the top two fundraisers of the week. We are leaving mo stone unturned! (Pardon the prostate pun!)

Daily, I’m answering the question at every meeting, every fundraiser, every lunch, every flight and every coffee shop. “Oh, you’re doing Movember.” Perfect strangers. Tired baristas. Over-worked clients. All want to spend a few minutes joshing about the ‘stache and telling stories of what’s happening in their workplace.

When I send out fundraising appeal emails I raise as many chuckles as I do mollars! One guy I used to coach football with accompanied this picture of me with the following caption.

Calling all cars. Black & white football coach on the loose. Doesn’t like to punt. Arrest immediately.

My rivals have told me I’m going to lose business. My friends have extended their sympathy to my wife. My children want to rub their cheeks against it.

Mark
Mork Harrison seeks Mindy!

If you haven’t caught the Mo’ yet, I encourage you to do so. Prostate Cancer Canada is not a client of mine. I’m sure my actual NFP clients are shaking their heads right now over my infatuation with Movember.

But I am infatuated with this event!

Mo Harrison

PS. I’m in the Porter Lounge as I write this and two women behind me are talking about Movember.

PS2. At a “meeting” at the Irish Embassy on rue Bishop in Montreal, I spotted this poster!

Mo’ Pitch!

I’m a stickler for typos, so it took me a few minutes to realize that when one of my MojanOne “Movember” teammates sent me the one sentence email, “How is it Moing?” that they weren’t being sloppy! Or MOppy! They were having mo’ fun!

Sensing there was some MOmentum building in our office for this MOvember thing, I wanted to check out how the rest of our team was doing.

Our Calgary team, who are sporting the IDA moniker for Integrated Duster Activations, struck a pose on Day One that has them off and facing to some big fundraising goals. One of our interns has already raised two hundred and ten MOllars! Meow!

That would put her in second place the Toronto office, where one of our mo’s is already at $300 mones.

So, at the risk of being left behind in the must, I realized I had to seize the day and start MOwing some lawns. So here MOes.

Let’s start with the basics. We all know that 1 in 6 Canadian men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer in their lifetimes. Last year, one of those was my father.

Unlike his son, my dad isn’t keen on publicity. (Guess the rumours of my being adopted are true!). But I have to brag a little.

My dad is the greatest man on earth.

He taught high school for a hundred years in Orillia, and was the most popular teacher in school. His class was machine shop, but his lessons were about life. He took kids to our cottage, took them on canoe trips, and took them to personal heights they would never have reached without him. He loved his students like they were his children, and as an immature youth, I was actually jealous of that.

On a teacher’s salary, he was the richest man in town. He had a warmth that everyone felt and bought winter boots for kids who couldn’t afford them. He treated everyone like a king, especially the janitors because he knew a school couldn’t exist without them.

As a father, he taught me to rake every leaf on the lawn, clear every snowflake from the driveway, and capture every speck of dirt in the garage. At 45, I’m still enthusiastically trying to meet his standards. As a husband, he has made my mother’s life magical for 53 years and they will never be apart.

I’m dedicating my involvement in Movember to my dad. When we were kids, my friends called him “Sugar Ron” because he used to be a boxer. (Google Sugar Ray Leonard if you don’t get the point!). Well, he’s still a fighter! He’s knocking the crap out of PC!

Please join me in raising awareness about Prostate Cancer and support Movember. Join a team, donate to me or my team at movember.com/mospace/770320/, or support someone else’s team.

Do it for you dad, your granddad, your dad-in-law, future dads, and all the other dads that give us our Mojo!

Mo Harrison

Swing Vote

I read the other day that a guy named “Bubbles” is running for mayor in my hometown of Orillia.

Apparently, this is quite funny. But, since I don’t watch Trailer Park Boys, I don’t quite get the Bubbles part. Locals report he is a dead ringer for the TV show character; although, in real life, he is a piano technician and apparently an SPCA volunteer. While he hasn’t put his name on the official log, the unofficial candidate is taking a stab at being a duopolous mayor as he is simultaneously running in Severn Township. Clearly, there is no shortage of ambition here.

Bubbles, the candidate, wants Rush to play a concert in Orillia (his iPod is full of Rush tunes) and for Tim Horton’s to offer free coffee on Sundays. That along with his desire to have a wet bar at town council meetings.

I like this guy.

Looking closer to home, I see that a local high school football coach is well on the way to becoming Mayor of Toronto.

Geez, if I knew that volunteer high school football coaches could become Mayor, I might have run. Okay, maybe not.

But, I am going to do a little politicking right now. Don’t worry, I have no interest in swaying how you vote. Except in the most basic way. And that is to encourage you to vote.

You see, I have been involved in a few too many political arguments lately. Not arguments but heated discussions. In all of them, one thing has become clear: I don’t really understand our municipal system and I don’t pay attention to what happens in my city.

And you know what? What happens at City Hall impacts me at work and at home.

The good news is I have an old university friend running in my riding, so I have been to a couple of her campaign events and that has whetted my appetite. But I want to take it further. I want to help Canada get out and vote.

But why? Why should we vote?

I can tell you what I want to see in Toronto. You can tell me what you want to see in Halifax or Regina or Québec City or Medicine Hat or Bellville.

I would like to see somebody run under a platform of “Activating the City of Toronto Brand.” Like all great brands, the City of Toronto brand has a promise. It is time to keep those promises.

So, what promises should the City of Toronto make to me?
•    That I’m not dreaming that the Leafs are 3-0 (by the time you read this they may be 3 & 18!)
•    That I can drive my bike all over the city in a safe, protected lane… go to Amsterdam if you are unsure of what I mean!
•    That I can have clean streets, sidewalks, and parks.
•    That I won’t get shot trying to be an anti-gang activist.
•    That a shopkeeper won’t face five years in jail trying to stop someone from robbing him. Again. Like twice in the same day. (Look it up, true story. Robber got 60 days and robbed again. He got out. Shop owner is facing five years for chasing him down and forcing him back to his store to be arrested)
•    That my community pool will open before August.
•    That we will tear down Varsity Stadium and rebuild it the way it should be: open-air, grass-filed, seating for 25,000 crazy high school, Varsity Blues and Argos fans!
•    That we will we bury the Gardiner and make an amazing waterfront featuring real parks and get rid of all the sugar plants and ugly smelters.
•    That someone will grant more parking for Porter Airlines or give them a bridge or underpass to Billy Bishop Airport.
•    That people across Canada stop calling us the Center of the Universe. It makes me blush!

Everyday Should be “Sports Day”

Last Saturday we helped our clients at ParticipACTION stage the first ever Sports Day in Canada.

Through partnerships with CBC and True Sport, ParticipACTION was able to mobilize over four hundred communities to stage 1,000 local events attended by over one million people. An unbelievable start!

From the day ParticipACTION CEO Kelly Murumets, CBC Sports President Scott Moore, and yours truly huddled to brainstorm this idea, I knew we were on to something big.

Like all great ideas, it wasn’t entirely new. CBC had pioneered the model for the sport celebration “day” with their Hockey Day and Soccer Day properties. Various amateur sports groups and affiliates had attempted to put a “Sport Week” together for a long time.  But a great idea is only great if it gets executed.

Sports Day in Canada came along at the right time. On the heels of an unbelievable Paralympics and Olympics on Canadian soil, there is tremendous enthusiasm for sport in our society. Unfortunately, at the other end, sport enrollment has been declining over the past fifteen years. So, ‘Sports Day’ presented an opportunity to create a national holiday of sorts for sport.

Sports Day in Canada featured a week long series of events including ‘Jersey Day’ on Friday, September 17th. A modest success for its first year, the idea behind Jersey Day was to get all Canadians to wear a sports outfit to work, school, or play that day.

On the big day, I was in Kingston where the Queen’s-McGill varsity women’s basketball game was broadcast from. The game featured the 100th anniversary of women’s basketball in CIS sport. Now, that is an event worth celebrating on Sports Day.

Across the country there were a series of great events, such as Canada Games Day in Prince Albert. Part of the upcoming 2011 Halifax Canada Games’ efforts to spread the fever across the country.

In Iqaluit, they featured a hip-hop event hosted by a woman who calls herself “Lil Bear.” Free for youth 11 and up, the free event was a big attraction for aspiring boys and girls.

In Charlottetown, the Bluephins Aquatic Club held an Open House as they and other Swimming Canada clubs promoted their sport as an essential for all young Canadians.

Sports Day scored big with Canadians from coast to coast to coast. Sports Day scored big with the news media garnering 388 hits and over 46 million impressions. Sports Day scored big with many key stakeholders, like the Canadian Paralympic Committee, who were enthusiastically involved.

In the long run, Sports Day will be one of the biggest properties in Canada. But it wont be a true success if its just one day. Everyday should be “Sports Day” in this country.

Sport builds community.
Sport builds relationships.
Sport builds people.

It is one of the activities that can make us all healthier, happier, and richer. Because healthier people are smarter people. Healthier people are more motivated. Healthier people cost you and I less tax dollars!

So while SDIC #1 is in the books, I would ask all of you to help ensure that SDIC #2 happens today, not September 17, 2011.

So, join a team; sign up for a race; go buy a bat and ball. Get out and play some sort of sport today. Do it with friends, family, neighbours and co-workers. Do it with strangers. I guarantee you they wont be strangers for long.

Game On!

Gratuity Not Included

Just got back from France. My only regrets are why did I wait until I was 45 to go and why did I only go for a week?

So if you are out there and under the age of 45… go now!

Spent a couple of days in Cassis and it’s better than the movies. Okay I don’t know if there even is a move set in Cassis, but there should be. This Mediterranean beauty rises from the sea, hugged by mountainous rocks and cliffs on all sides. Spectacular scenery, great food – unbelievable all round.

From there we railed to Paris for four days and it totally consumed me. Every waking moment my mind, heart, and soul were no longer my own. Collectively they were floating through time as the overwhelming history of the city kept my senses in overdrive. Every sight and every sound only wetted my appetite for more.

Speaking of appetite, we had some good meals and some okay meals. Mostly good. Especially the basics. Breakfast was to die for – the eggs alone were worth the flight. Even in the crummiest holes. Lunch was always good because I’m a bread junkie. Most of our dinners were solid, with our first Paris dinner at Ma Bourgogne, a true highlight. Have the bouef for sure!

The service that first night was as good as the food, which essentially ruined me for the rest of my trip. Because for the next few days I got to see a whole new approach to customer service.

We had waiters who yelled at customers in line. Waiters who looked away while flirting with their girlfriends, who were hanging out on the street. Waiters who ignored us so long I sent my seven year old to the hostess stand to get menus. Waiters who wouldn’t stop for my nine year old as he desperately tried to catch their attention with his French-immersion language skills.

It didn’t ruin our trip. But it did provide a few laughs. I guess being a travel neophyte I didn’t realize the secret of French restaurants. The tip is included. In everything.

Café de crème? They get a tip.
Upgrade to pain au choclat. Tip is in.
Order a sandwich. Merci for the gratuity!

How can that be?

I have waitered all my life. I am convinced there is no better way to earn money and have fun at work.

I’ve had great times waitering. The highs of when the staff were partying harder than the patrons and the lows of when I’ve been “in the weeds” so deep it felt like quicksand.

Started when I was fifteen at a lodge on Sparrow Lake. My real job was maintenance man, boat rental, and snack shop operator… but in my spare time I served some tables as well.

In high school I ruled the Orillia wedding circuit from my perch as the head table waiter at the Highwayman Inn. (Make way Adam Sandler!) The Highwayman had two of the nicest (interpret as you wish) banquet rooms in Orillia. Soon after being hired, I won the right to exclusively serve the head tables.

This was a lot of fun for a lot of reasons. First of all, there was always an extra big tip from the bride’s Father. I would always mark him early during the cocktail reception and go up and introduce myself. I was easy to recognize because all the other waiters wore red jackets with their bow ties. Mine was gold. It may not seem like much but the colour coding was a brilliant touch by my manager. The gold jacket made pops feel like we were going all out for his baby girl.

So being the lifelong butt-kisser that I am, the FOB was my first stop. I would let him know I was taking care of the head table and the family table as well. That only my handpicked bussers and I would serve them. And that if they needed anything extra, like a second helping of black forest cake for his “doting” wife, just to give me a nod. This little bit of presell resulted in the pre-tip. FOB usually pressed a twenty in my hand and told me there was more where that came from. I sometimes unfolded the bill and held it out, to be VERY clear I expected a lot more later on. It always worked.

I went from hotel land to resort land for my next stop in servitude. This time to Paignton House on Lake Rousseau. Paignton isn’t there anymore, apparently replaced by a big Marriott resort called the Red Leaf. In its day, Paignton House may have been a poor man’s Cleveland House, but it was an awesome place to work.

At Paignton I switched to bartending, which was as much fun as it looks. We had everything in our bar. Conventioneers who looked at our pretty co-workers and promptly declared we were having the time of our lives. Think of the great line from pimp in Risky Business – “time of your life, eh kid.” We got that at least once a week. Locals who despised us because we kept more Schooner chilled in the beer fridge than their beloved 50. Yes Schooner was a top selling beer in the early 80’s. If you’re too young to remember, Google it. Couples who would come in to see our horrific evening shows; we had the dancers from “Circus” one night and a hypnotist on others. Typically they were up with their families for their regular summer week of vacay, and a night out in our bar meant one of the chambermaids was dutifully babysitting their kids. (Code for entertaining her lifeguard boyfriend and their pal MJ).

From there I bumped along to a few serving jobs in Guelph while I attended Moo U. My favourite was at a place called McGinnis Landing. I worked for an absentee owner named Larry, who died all too young a few years ago of a sudden aneurysm and with a bunch of people who loved to party.

It didn’t take long for me to take over the bar and establish a friendship with the queen of the dining room, a young waitress named Emily, who had been working there since she was three…or so she acted. (Her work ethic paid off years later as she is now one of the founding partners of the ad hot shop John Street).

McGinnis was a great place to earn and save. Not only did I gorge on leftovers and mysterious extra orders of chicken wings, but also I quickly perfected using the restaurant equipment as my personal Laundromat. My staff uniform went from war zone to Calgon clean with a few spins through the glass washer in the bar and then a speed dry utilizing our high-temp pizza ovens. Hey, maybe the guests weren’t enthralled by my rags to dishes approach, but they didn’t have to look!

Circling back to modern times (it was the 1980’s when I worked at McGinnis), I have always felt like serving at a bar or donning a tray was my ultimate fall back, if the agency world didn’t work for me.

Unfortunately, a much as I would love to live in Paris, I don’t think it will be as a waiter. I would probably get removed form the “union” for being fast, responsive, and once in a while, even smiley. Then again, with my patented grumpiness… maybe I would fit right in?

People Watching

I get invited to a lot of stuff. Concerts. Games. Tournaments. Championships. Dinners. Lunches.

I realize I’m pretty spoiled. Rarely am I standing in lines, fighting for a place to pee, or sitting on a bleacher.

Typically my tickets read Chairman’s Lounge, Owner’s Suite, SkyBox, VIP Box, Premium Seat, blah, blah.
Like many of you in this business my monthly schedule becomes highlighted by my collection of used event lanyards in my desk. I really need to throw these away.

Beyond the nice seats, free booze, limited access restrooms, and hit or miss food selections… the best part of these seats are the people. First and foremost my hosts, and then other industry people, and then the random people you meet. I can count dozens of industry colleagues that I originally met at an event.

This year I’ve developed a new habit at these events. I’ve become a groupie. And I am somewhat ashamed.

I didn’t used to be a groupie. Outside of eating dinner next to Courtney Cox and Jennifer Aniston one night in Chicago, so long ago that Courtney was the bigger celebrity than Jennifer. (Remember those days? Hard to believe!). That night I was a major groupie.

But something has happened to me. My groupie gene has suddenly emerged from the depths of my fat cells. Somewhere this 227-pound, balding, middle-aged man has become a groupie.

In 2010 I have leapt over tables, pushed aside children, and cut off hard working volunteers for all sorts of pictures, handshakes, and maybe even soon an autograph request. Although I haven’t gone there yet.

Al Michaels. Richard Branson. Chris Collinsworth. Alexandre Bilodeau. Seth Grodin. Stephen Harper. Donovan Bailey. You name them… I’m posing with them.

What has happened to me? Why am I posing for pictures that I spray out to my family and friends and then forget about in two days? Do I really think my poor Mom wants to see me with a goofy grin on my face, while some famous person recoils from the grip of my arm and the aroma of a man who definitely needed another pass of his Old Spice stick??

I don’t know.

On Sunday at the Honda Indy (Toronto version), I had another opportunity. I was seated in a box right at the Start/Finish line, courtesy of the race owners (Green Savoree), and also right behind the pit of Dario Franchitti. Better known as Mr. Ashley Judd.

You have to understand the very front row of our suite was VVIP “reserved” for a movie star, according to the catering staff. So when Ms. Judd appeared in her husband’s pit… my mind was racing. Could it be? Would it be? Was I about to snuggle up for a Blackberry close-up, with the number one fan of Kentucky Wildcats basketball? I couldn’t wait to tell her that I was at the 1997 Final Four in Indianapolis. I saw her there too. I was only 280 rows behind her. Do you think 13 years later she would remember?

You’ve probably guessed I have a little Ashley Judd crush going. It probably coloured my thinking on Sunday.

So instead of the race, I got on the Ashley watch. She was wearing a sun hat (remarkably like one my wife has) and a green summer dress that matched her husbands paint scheme for the race.

She entered the pit and grabbed a race control radio. I thought this is perfect, when she meets me, she can tell her husband about it! Or not.

Then she sat on some tires. Two pit guys made small talk with her.

One offered a bottle of water. She declined. Another offered a swig from his energy drink. She had a dry heave.

Then she got up and surveyed the pits. Hmm… was she looking for the stairs up to the suites so she could sit next to me?

She moved three feet under the canopy to check the monitors. What IS the delay?

Then some important people came by. Two got hugs, one got a cheek kiss. I still hadn’t gotten my picture. Frustrating.

The race began. Hey Ashley your husband is moving. You should too. Like up here!

The race had a yellow flag. Hey friend, Dario can’t do anything right now but drive in circles, why don’t we talk about my injured knee if you’re bored?

The drivers got to pit. Ashley didn’t help with anything. Maybe she isn’t as happy with her man she seems. Then again those pit guys move pretty quick.

The race resumed. Hubby was in second. I’m sure she would have a better view from our suite. She has to be hungry, the skinny little thing.

The laps ticked away. Every click of the lap counter excited the race fans looking forward to a big finish. I was scheming new schemes at every lap.

Oh boy. Two laps to go. I give up. Took a picture of her back. I didn’t think screaming “Stella” at this point would have gone over well with my hosts. I emailed it to my best friend. Too ashamed to share with my family. He replied I was a loser.

He’s got it wrong. I’m a groupie.

Dog Days of Summer

I’m a dog man.

Love them. Always have. When I was a kid it was our beagles, Duke and Sparky, and then a lab named Baron. He was a black beauty.

So gorgeous he was once kidnapped near our cottage outside of Dorset. As we searched frantically for him at the boat launch on our last day of vacation, all of my family members felt ensuing panic. He never strayed. Finally we spotted him in a boat speeding across the lake, clearly not in a voluntary manner.

As we shouted loudly for him to escape the villains and jump out of the boat (which he eventually did), my then little brother cried to my parents: ” Why couldn’t it have been Mark?!” (No wonder we don’t speak today!)

My first dog as an adult was another beagle. Buddy.

Buddy was legendary. He came to pitches. He helped me launch Trojan in 1994. He ran away all the time. He made me late for weddings and almost late for the birth of my first son.

Bud passed a few years ago. Cancer. He pooped on me while the vet’s needle sucked out his last few breaths. I didn’t even notice the feces until I was walking to my car, blinded by salty tears. It didn’t matter.

Buddy was overlapped for a while with Lucy, my dearly departed father-in-laws mini Schnauzer. Lucy almost made me become a dog hater. But nothing could. Earlier this year she passed and then we went in a pet holiday. Or so we thought.

The idea behind the pet holiday was to be pet free for a year and then get a new puppy.

Until one day a wee tabby showed up on our doorstep. This stray was skinny, noisy, but cute. She just kept coming round. And around. And around.

We didn’t let her in. We didn’t feed her. But we gave her some attention and that seemed to be more than enough.

Then one day I caved. I gave her milk.

Well, the milk was a mistake but we soon started leaving some of Lucy’s old dog kibble. She liked it.

Then we let her in. Then we got her cat food. Then we took her to vet. We thought she was just a kitten. Turns out she was pregnant!

We thought she was healthy. Turns out she had a severe heart murmur.

We thought she had a home. Turns out Craiglist proved her homeless.

So, suckers we are. We adopted her. We named her Murmur. The kids liked that. We thought it was cute. And I fell in love.

Who knew a cat could be so affectionate? Who knew she would sleep on my neck? Who knew that seeing her on my stoop every night when I got home from work would warm my heart?

All of sudden I’m a cat person. For a joyous few weeks….

Then she had a kitten! Just one. But how cool. Right in my closet under my sports coats. The kids went nuts. The neighbors paraded in. And we all said, “Ahhhhhhhh”.

And Murmur went from the night prowler we had first met to a dotting mommy. Sure, she went out twice a day for air. But she came right back and got to the feeding, cleaning and loving.

Until two weeks ago Monday.

We let her out at 9:00 to pee and she didn’t come back. I checked for her five times before I went to bed.

The next day, still no Murmur. But lots of panic as we had one hungry kitty. Emergency run to the vet and some formula secured and suddenly my wife is feeding a newborn again!

Another night. No Murmur.

Cue the search party. Every garage, every pool shed, every backyard for three blocks was scoured. Until the inevitable news.

Giving birth created one life, but ended another. Murmur was found in a neighbour’s yard. Her little heart ran out of gas. And suddenly I realized that my five weeks as a cat lover were over.

I couldn’t believe how sad I was. “Man up,” I said! It was just a few weeks. It was just a cat.

Alas, Murmur left us a lovely gift. The kitty probably only weighs half a pound but she is crazy gorgeous. The kids named her Whisper. Cute. (And I’m pretty excited about their creative skills… so I may assign them to our next new business pitch).

I still want a dog. But he is going to have to like cats. Just like his Master.

Dog Days of Summer II

The Heat won.

For a week it was so warm that we humans couldn’t function properly.

The Heat beat us down. It took away our desire to be outside. It made sleep impossible for those without AC. It reduced exercise time, dog walking time. It stained armpits. It even made patios less desirable!

Then the Heat beat down the NBA.  And fans in many cities across North America. The Miami Heat that is.

We all know by now the Heat was successful in securing the “Three Kings”…Le Bron, D-Wade, and Cowboy Chris Bosh.

But did the Heat win? Their franchise value jumped $40 million. Their season ticket prices jumped 50%. Their road games instantly became sold out. Maybe.

Did the NBA win? Boffo interest in the league during a typical downtime. Unprecedented media coverage. A prime time special on ESPN.

Did Chris Bosh win? A chance to play in South Florida with two of the best players in the game. Under the slick watch of the legendary Pat Riley. With South Beach and all its attractions right out your front door.

Did D-Wade win? A chance to stay loyal to his team and also have two stars join him on center court.

Did LeBron win? A bigger market to showcase his skills. A chance for him to be part of the cool, South Florida lifestyle. An escape from Cleveland, which seems perpetually cursed to win nothing. Ever. Never.

I don’t think the league won this week. Not because the players exercised their rights and in unprecedented fashion three star free agents all chose the same destination. Not because I think the league was manipulated. With the current CBA about to expire, these players knew what they were doing. It was more than that.

The league lost because some of its biggest names put themselves first. And not the customers. The NBA is an entertainment business. It’s about t-shirts. It’s about tickets. It’s about TV ratings.

Who pays for those souvenirs? Who buys the duckets? Whose eyeballs support the advertisers?

The fans, pure and simple.

Throughout this whole process, not one word was mentioned about the customer. Not one team owner, not one coach, not one player said, “We have to do what’s best for the fan.” Uh-uh. Natta. Nil.

All the talk was about winning championships and sacrifice. Sacrifice… are you kidding me? The fact that Bosh may only made $90 or $100 million on his deal versus $120 million is a sacrifice? Get a grip.

But the good news for the NBA is that there is a bigger loser. LeBron.

He lost an opportunity to be a hero. An icon. Jordan could have left Chicago early on, but he stayed and willed out a champion.

Dan Marino could have fled the Dolphins, but he stayed and never won a title. He was loyal. He fought.

Steve Y could have left the Wings, but instead he built a dynasty.

Stay and deliver. When Gretzky got traded, he was bitter and it was a business thing. But he poured his heart out for Edmonton.

When LeBron said FUC… (as in FU Cleveland!)… he turned his back on his home state and the team that had done cartwheels to build a champion around him.

LeBron has yet to put in a courtesy call to “Cleveland” to give thanks. He is off preening with Bosh and Wade.

Let him.

He has damaged his brand. He has lost his chance to be immortal. He is chasing some hardware, when he should be chasing immortality.

I hope he never wins a championship. I hope he and Wade fight over the ball. I hope the Heat piss teams off so much they rise up and clobber them. Every game of the year.

All the guy had to do was do it with class. Take out full-page newspaper ads. Thank the fans. Admit that he knows they will be pissed off with him. Say he is sorry and yes he is being a bit selfish and maybe he is making a mistake.

But be a man.

The NBA under David Stern has become a marvelous league. It has amazing talents and long standing rivalries like the Lakers and Celtics. Most of its teams are on solid footing, and unlike hockey, many of its expansion markets are thriving.

The NBA deserved better from its alleged biggest star.

It’s not what happened. It’s how it happened.

Many many people should have known better. Treat your customers with respect!